Actually, it did not take that long! I mean my break from blogging. Well, I promised to come back only when I have something good to talk about and I'm not sure if I have that thing. But I feel so good these days, and may be telling you how good I feel deserves blogging. Maybe I have to, after I bothered you with all those depressing posts!!!
Thank God I'm feeling better. The last couple of months were miserable. I guess I started to feel lonely, overwhelmed, and depressed the day my husband went back to work after the c-section. I had to resume my all responsibilities as a mom and wife, and I guess I was not fully ready to do so. Despite all my husband's help and understanding, I still could not manage it. I needed help, mentally and physically. But my husband was there all the time. I guess without his support, help, and love, I wouldn't be able to move on and feel better.
I was so sensitive, emotional, and confused. I couldn't control my feelings, and I even couldn't think right. I found myself getting angry for the silliest things. I couldn't handle crying for nothing. When I remember these things now, I feel so silly!!
Okay, what happened to make things better? I have no idea! And I think I'm not all better, but much better, I guess. I feel myself again, I can think right again, and I can enjoy things again! One of the things that helped was going out more. I stayed home most of the time in the last couple of months. Having a newborn and nursing him made hanging out uneasy. Cold weather made things more miserable. So last week my husband decided to work from home for the whole week so I can hang out everyday in the morning while the girls at school. He took care of the baby while I'm out. I had the chance to do something different each day. I went shopping on one day, had a lunch with my girl friends on another day. Feeling free again made all the difference.
Before getting to the end of this post I just want to mention something. Few weeks ago I wrote something about friendship; how keeping up friendship is hard. It's true, especially when you feel down. It's sometimes not your friends' fault as it's yours. Mad people can't be understanding and forgiving as they should be. I know that I have always to find excuses and to give more chances to my friends, but I didn't. I need to listen more and talk less, since talking does not always help. It didn't help in my case!
I guess that was a long post. Thanks for hanging on with me! It feels good to be back :)
Welcome back ya amar ...happy that u feel better wal7amdolellah
ReplyDeleteMay God bless ur sweet family and protect u all, w y5alekom la ba3ad ya rab
Happy new year :)
These are hard days, and c-section recovery adds an element of tiredness and helplessness to what could have been post-partum depression.
ReplyDeleteThese are the fog-years...babies and young children and all the usual responsibilities of caring for husband and home. Sometimes it's like living in a blurry fog of activity that never allows enough time to do it all well.
God is there with you. Remember the Footprints poem? He may be carrying you, but you could be too tired to realize it. There is a verse in the prophet Isaiah that says He gently cares for those who are with young.
Your husband is a gem. Sub7anAllah for his discernment and help. Children do change friendships, too. Blessings to you, Susu!!
Whisper and kinzi,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the kind words. Happy new year!